Wanting my best friend at my wedding?
I am getting married in Clearwater, FL in August. My best friend lives in Kansas City, KS and I really want her to stand by me at my wedding along with my brother. She has had money problems lately so I scraped the money together to pay for her flight and her dress for the wedding. I e-mailed her and told her I would be happy to provide this if she can cover her hotel room for the days she wants to stay. I also told her I will pick her up from and take her to the airport for the trip and, since it's at a resort, she won't really need a car for anything else. I wish I could cover the hotel too, but I don't have the money. So I e-mailed this to her and told her that I am not trying to pressure her and, if she really can't afford it, I will totally understand, but that I really want her there and would like to help. I also told her if she needs to bring her 1 yr. old son, she can and we will work out getting him taken care of during the wedding (I'm having tons of family there). So the questions is, that was over a week ago and I haven't heard from her since. I told her to take her time and think about it, so I don't want to call and ask her, but I would like to know if I have offended her somehow or why she is not calling me to tell me one way or the other. I am trying to be patient. Would that offend you or not? I just can't imagine that it would have offended her but I don't know why she hasn't called. Thoughts? I am asking for an outside opinion on whether something like that would offend you? Of course I know her but i've never done something like this before so I wondered how it sounded to ther people.
Weddings - 12 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I would definitely give your friend a call. If she is having some money problems it may be possible that she had her internet shut down and can't check her email. Give her a call to say hello and casually bring it up. She is your best friend-I am sure that she understands that you want her to be there; maybe she is trying to figure things out on her end and perhaps that is something you can help her with.
2 :
You should call her. You are being More than reasonable. Give her a deadline and say that you need to figure out the logistics and you need to know by that date. if she doesn't respond, find someone else.
3 :
NO i would not be offended at all. I think you are being more than generous and kind. maybe she is just trying to see if she can scrap up some cash? sit tight.
4 :
She's probably not offended. She probably really wants to be there, but knows she can't afford it and doesn't want to say no. She might still be trying to come up with a way to make it happen. Give her another week and then call her.
5 :
this isnt really a question..i mean now your just kinda complaining to everyone..if she cant she cant..we all know you want her their..idk why you posted this..its a waste of a question. thanks for the two points though
6 :
She's your best friend, not ours. What do you think ? Give her a call. She will probably be pleased to hear from you.
7 :
Maybe she is trying to yet figure out how to pay for the rest of it. I wouldn't be offended from what you have told me. How long ago did you ask her? She may even be trying to make arrangements to find a sitter for her son or something else may be going on right now. I would ask her in a week if I haven't heard from her.
8 :
She probably is just trying to look for ways to get some money to go, so just give her a couple of more weeks and teh you can ask her.
9 :
No, it is not offensive because your motives are genuine and worthy. However, as the mother of a one year old, it is probably difficult for her to even consider paying for the hotel room in clearwater florida, and perhaps she is having difficulty turning down your generous offer, because she still cannot afford to come. She probably feels a bit ashamed to be telling you she does not have the money, and is torn between making up some excuse, or telling you the honest truth. People are proud, you know, and I am sure your gf is having trouble with this. Why don't you give her a call, my dear, and tell her that if this is still not something she can afford, you understand. Or, perhaps, you can find her lodging at your brother's home, or she can sleep on the couch at your home, if that might make it easier.
10 :
It wouldn't offend me, it would show me how good a firend you are. "Mosho" needs to grow up
11 :
I would call her. Chances are, if she's strong-headed like myself, she's not gonna want "chump charity". I hate taking people's money, and she might, too. Personally, I wouldn't be offended. If she's having money problems, let her do what she feels is right. #1: take the money and be there at your wedding like a good friend should be there OR #2: Refuse the charity and look like a bad friend. My best friend since 8th grade will not be able to make it to my wedding in Vegas, but confuses me because she still has 10 months or so to save up. My little sister makes 1/2 of what she makes and is still managing to scrounge up the money to go.
12 :
She probably isnt offended, but maybe feels like she may cause money problems for you. Maybe invite her to stay at your home. Tell her how you feel about want her in the wedding, and you will understand if she is unable to miss work, but if it is possible you would love to have her, and pay the trip.